I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
