When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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