Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
