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  • unbeknownst to you, my penis and i keep no secrets from each other and are truly bff's. and that 'secret handshake' where he 'spills' his secrets on you was my idea.

    Submitted by AreYouShittinMe on Sep 13, 11 at 1:13pm
  • Stage 5 clinger. Watch out.

    Submitted by sssmarie on Sep 13, 11 at 1:31pm
  • If you are best friends, why does he spit on you everytime he sees you?

    Submitted by W_T_F on Sep 13, 11 at 1:32pm
  • Did it tell you he wants to meet all your friends?

    Submitted by porksword on Sep 13, 11 at 8:09pm
  • Very well then...carry on...

    Submitted by sevensevenseven on Sep 13, 11 at 3:51pm
  • Oh shit crazy bitch alert! Get one last HJ then abort! Ok maybe two... Then abort, all right one mor.... Oh shit we have fallen for her trap!

    Submitted by Squarewheel on Sep 21, 11 at 8:11pm
  • Desperate to not let go of the D

    Submitted by Babygirlxoxo on Feb 2, 14 at 12:02pm
  • This is San Diego for you.

    Submitted by jacobbaugh on Sep 13, 11 at 4:53pm
  • Tell that crazy chick your penis said it's over and it don't want no lip about it!

    Submitted by Indecisivewitdis on Sep 13, 11 at 5:08pm
  • Oof. The grammar is a turn off.

    Submitted by jltc on Sep 13, 11 at 5:06pm
    • your use of an interjection is a turn off because interjections have no real grammatical value.

      Submitted by clamsmash on Sep 14, 11 at 1:23am
  • Dude, I told you it was only one time!

    Submitted by LoboMatt on Sep 15, 11 at 1:50pm
  • This is, by far, the MOST pathetic thing I have ever read; well @ least on TFLN.

    Submitted by untameableshrew on Sep 13, 11 at 1:54pm