What did we do last night that was yellow?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
