I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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