We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
