I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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