If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
