he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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