One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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