dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
