laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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