Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
