i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
