either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
