Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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