ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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