Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
