how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
