i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize