never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
