i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Randomize
