Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
