do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
We had to coat check the pizza.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
