It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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