I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
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I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
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I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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