with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Watching her eat just hurts me
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
