So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
