Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize