...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
