i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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