I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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