I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
