so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
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