what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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