what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
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