It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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