Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
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