Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
