The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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