i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
