white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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