Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
