The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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