if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
only you would photoshop your dick
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I think weed is turning my hair brown
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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