He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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