You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
