I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
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