just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
