The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize